Moving On After a Break Up

Breakups are always difficult for the two people involved. Life suddenly becomes darker, and there is a great void to be dealt with. This phase can be pretty traumatic for the couple, especially for the person who did not initiate the breakup. Everyone has their own way of dealing with this kind of situation. Some people may shut themselves away from the world, while others may begin going out and partying like never before. No matter which way you choose, the basic 3-step process of recovering remains the same: mourning, acceptance, and then moving on.

Here are some more tips to help you heal faster.

Do Not Blame
People often resort to playing the blame game after their relationship hits a rock. It is unfair to blame yourself, your partner, or anyone else for that matter. Blaming and pointing fingers won’t really help you to move on, it will rather delay the process. Instead, just think about how whatever happened, happened for a good reason. Do not have bitter feelings for the other person or yourself.

Cry Your Heart Out
The demise of a relationship is no less traumatic than the demise of a person. The very thought that the person you shared so many wonderful moments with will no longer be with you is very depressing. Hence, do not shy away from expressing your genuine feelings. It’s okay to cry out and isolate yourself for a few days, just don’t make it a habit. Call a friend who will understand and can offer you some genuine advice.

Do Not Wait for Him/Her to Return
Do not live in the hope that the person you loved will come back to you. Do not try to re-establish contact with the person in the same hope. Remember that there is no point in ‘being friends’, as that will only make you more hopeful and postpone dealing with the broken relationship. Instead, leave the past behind and start living your life.

Re-acquaint with Friends and Family
When in a relationship, a couple tends to drift away from their circle of family and friends and gets engrossed into a world of their own. So, this is the right time to re-acquaint yourself with those long lost friends and relatives. Go out with them more often and you’ll discover that there are other relations in life which are just as important.

Pamper Yourself
Do not feel sorry for yourself, as that can hamper your self-esteem in the long run. Instead, pamper yourself by doing all the things you longed for while you were in the relationship. Buy some nice clothes, make an appointment at a spa, or take that vacation you so desperately wanted. In short, do all those activities which you wanted to do all those years.

Sort Out the Legal Matters
If there are any legal matters such as shared accommodation, joint bank accounts etc. involved, then sort them out as early as possible. Do not delay these matters, as they may create complications for you in the future and re-open the wounds.

Beware of a New Relationship
Do not rush into a new relationship before you have given yourself enough time to recover from the previous one. It is very easy to fall for the person who offers a shoulder to cry on during your troubled time. This is the mistake most people do and they end up with another wrong person, which eventually results in a fall-out again. Hence, make sure you are emotionally stable to handle another relationship, and only then proceed.

Moving on after the end of a relationship is not easy, but you can do it. If you face your life positively, you’ll emerge a stronger person than you were before.

Tips on Dealing with a Broken Heart

A broken heart brings with it a lot of grief and sadness, where it is perfectly natural for a person to feel devastated. But what one has to remember here is that it is not the end of the world. You need to come to terms with it and bounce back to a normal, with of course adequate time taken to get over the heartache. Unfortunately, while many books tout their claims on being able to offer breakup advice that works, they fail to be of any help to many of us. The key to getting over someone is to remain positive, avoid cynicism in any form, and focus on the things that you can do with your life that will give it new meaning and purpose.

How to Heal a Broken Heart

Put a Stop to Communication
You’re probably used to talking on the phone with your ex, but it is imperative that you sever the ties of communication. Many couples end their relationship by saying, ‘let’s be friends’. However, this does not always work, since old feelings and memories will inevitably crop up. So the best thing to do, is stop calling or taking calls from this person, if you want to get over the pain.

Don’t Dwell on the Past
During this period, you may be filled with conflicting emotions like anger, frustration, sadness, and other upsetting emotions. You’ll also feel the need to analyze every situation to gain a perspective of how things fell apart, dissecting every piece in your head until it drives you insane. Try to learn from your mistakes (if you are unfortunately at fault), but by no means blame yourself for the breakup. Cry if you have to, punch something until you can’t recognize it any longer―but don’t take it out on yourself, whether physically, emotionally, or mentally. Take up a new hobby, make time for the things you never got around to doing, or immerse yourself in a fun activity with family or friends.

Though it is necessary to have some ‘me’ time, this doesn’t mean that you have to remain a recluse for the rest of your life. The best people to help you deal with a broken heart are your friends and family. Talk to them and share your woes; they will surely understand and want to help.

Seek Therapeutic Options
If you lock yourself up at home and brood over what happened, you will never be able to snap out of it. Men and women should indulge in a little shopping to get their minds off their ex-loves. This doesn’t translate into abusing your power of owning a credit card; the bills that follow will just stress you out even more. Book an appointment at a spa and treat yourself to a luxurious full-body massage; you can also try other beauty treatments on the menu. Give yourself time to get over your past love―don’t jump into a relationship just yet; a rebound never did anyone much good.

Experiencing a failed relationship does not mean that life has met its end. Be open to meeting new people and live your life like it should be―with no regrets and hope for a better tomorrow. Every relationship has an important lesson to teach; learn what it teaches you with your head held high.