Love Relationships at Work

Bips was a young, vivacious woman with lots of dreams and career goals. She had recently joined a multinational company at an entry-level position, and was really excited about her new job. She had a great workplace, supportive colleagues, and a boss (John) who always encouraged her and appreciated her work. Bips secretly had the hots for her boss, but she didn’t dare speak to anyone about it, lest her boss found out. Little did she know that John hadn’t been able to take his eyes off her ever since she’d first stepped into the office. Well, such things rarely remain a secret for too long, and soon, both of them had begun seeing each other. As the days passed, Bips realized that she was beginning to fall in love with John. One night, however, she noticed a picture of another woman in his wallet. It turned out that the other woman was John’s wife. She questioned him about it and he looked the other way. It dawned on her. Things began to get ugly between them. Soon, word spread among the other co-workers. When the news reached the ears of the company’s CEO, he called them both to his cabin. Twenty minutes later, both were seen clearing their respective desks and drawers.

The above story was one possible scenario regarding the outcome of love relationships at your workplace. However, that does not mean that anyone and everyone who falls in love with someone from their workplace will suffer the same fate. No sir, that is definitely not what I am suggesting. What I am suggesting is that the concept of love relationships in the office is something that is extremely tricky, and one which needs to be given careful thought.

How Safe Are Relationships at Work?
Basically, when it comes to office or workplace romance, there are 2 main possibilities:
A genuine love relationship between two co-workers.
A casual fling or affair between two co-workers.
At the same time, there is another very important factor to consider―whether or not one of the co-workers is single. If you have a scenario wherein one of them is single, but the other is a married person having an extramarital affair, then this is nothing but a recipe for professional disaster. This kind of relationship will only invite trouble, regardless of whether the concerned twosome are genuinely in love with one another, or are having a casual affair. Such relationships are frowned upon at most professional workplaces, and the outcome is never too pleasing for the two people involved. You will only end up ruining your professional reputation, spoiling your professional resume, and hindering your career ambitions.

If however, it happens that both the concerned people are single and are genuinely in love with one another, then the situation is completely different. This type of relationship can, or may, have a positive outcome. Consider a situation wherein you (single) are in a serious relationship with someone else (also single) from your office. Now, if that person happens to be working in a different department, then things shouldn’t be a problem. If you both are serious about each other, and if you both feel that your relationship can grow in the future, or can go ahead in a positive direction, then it’s no one else’s business. This is a perfectly acceptable situation and one against which nobody should have a problem.

However, if you have a situation, wherein, you (single) happen to be in a serious love relationship with someone else (also single) who is either your superior, subordinate, or someone from your department whom you regularly work with, then this situation could lead to a few complications. However, these complications can be dealt with. If you are in a genuine relationship with either your superior or subordinate, and both of you see a positive future for your relationship, then you can consider speaking to someone from the higher management in order to get yourself transferred to a different department. That will solve the problem of awkwardness which otherwise would have existed, should either of you land up in a position where one has to report to the other.

Well, this was a little bit of relationship advice regarding the sensibility of entering into a love relationship at work. Remember, whether it is a fling or genuine love, it always manages to raise a few eyebrows. However, if you both ensure that you follow certain workplace ethics, then there’s no reason why it shouldn’t work.

How to Make a Woman Fall in Love With You

ATTENTION ALL ROMEOS!
For the following article to be of any use to you whatsoever, it is mandatory that you and your love interest meet at least once in person (and NOT in your dreams). This article is based on actual love, and not virtual love. Upon meeting her, it is vital that you know the right questions to ask the girl, in order to get to know her, only after which can you entertain any possible hopes of her falling in love with you.

Those of you who have skipped reading the above disclaimer and have directly landed on this line of text, stop right here. The future of your love life has been decided right here, right now. You will remain SINGLE all your life. Stop wasting time thinking about how to make her fall in love with you. No amount of dating tips will ever be of any help to you whatsoever. You, my friend, will forever remain an Adam sans a Madam. You want to know why? Because you weren’t attentive enough, you missed reading the first paragraph, and in doing so, you violated rule number one!

The Ultimate Guide to Make a Woman Fall for You

Rule #1: Pay attention to details
You CANNOT win the heart of any woman on this planet unless you remain alert and pay attention to detail. You HAVE to be on full systems alert when with a woman ― watch every movement of hers and listen to each and every word she says (And I do sympathize with you because I am yet to meet a woman who is not a chatterbox!). No matter where or at what time of the day (or night) the two of you meet; no matter how tired, sleepy, or hungry you may be, you instantly need to power on your love battery and be on full alert. Look at her, listen to her, and show an interest in what she is saying. Women do not like men who talk, talk, talk, and never listen. Chances of love and romance are directly proportional to your ethical listening abilities. (Ethical listening is nothing but focusing your ears on her vocals and your eyes above her neck). If and when you get a chance to say a few words, choose those which will showcase your intelligence, rather than those which will expose the lack of it.

Rule #2: Be yourself
Please be yourself. This is the universal dating tip for men all over the world. You don’t have to be a Brad Pitt in order to woo your woman. If you’re not exactly tall, dark, and handsome, that’s completely fine. Win her over with your heart, and not with your looks. Remember, beauty lies in the eyes of the beholder. Don’t try to be someone that you’re not. You’ll fall flat on your face and your love story will instantly become history.

Rule #3: Be indispensable
Become indispensable to her. PLEASE NOTE: Follow Rule #1 and read the rest of this rule, or else you may end up becoming her best friend to whom she comes crying after fighting with her boyfriend or fiance. By becoming indispensable, I mean becoming her friend and much more. That ‘much more’ is the difference between being relegated to just a friend and becoming the ‘special one’ whom she loves. There is no universal definition for that ‘much more’, it is something that you need to figure out for yourself. If you can’t, then all the best in being her best brotherly friend for life!

Rule #4: Be an innovative romantic
By this we mean, be romantic in an innovative way. There are plenty of ways (both successful and otherwise) of wooing a woman. Many of them involve doing the same age-old things such as gifting mixed tapes, presenting heart-shaped pendants, writing cheesy poems, etc. Some of them do work, whereas most are perceived to be extremely stereotyped and clichéd by women of the 21st century. So if your girl happens to be a rebel or a fiercely independent woman who is in tune with modern times and thoughts, then writing a silly sonnet on a pink paper sprayed with some run-of-the-mill chloroform-type cologne will only guarantee you a few more months of bachelorhood. Find out what your woman’s interests are, what are her likes and her dislikes, and act accordingly. Don’t take a lady who loves opera to an Avril Lavigne concert! If your Juliet happens to be a typical girl-next-door who has a fancy for all that is pink and mushy, then be a Romeo of the highest order! Gift your princess a couple of Mills & Boons and be her ‘knight in shining armor’. Shower her with a few lovey-dovey, romantic gifts. Make Shakespeare look down from the heavens and weep a tear or two. Show your romantic side in a way that is both creative and equally appealing to your lady love.

Rule #5: Care for her enough
Last but definitely not the least, show that you care for her. This is a very important piece of relationship advice. Show her that you are a genuine fellow who is here to stay and that you are not a fair-weather friend. Be there for her when she needs help. Support your woman through thick and thin. Once again, do NOT go overboard with this. Calling her every ten minutes to check on her will only ensure that you end up spending New Year’s Eve with Steve, instead of Eve.

These five rules are the fundamentals of sowing the seed of love in the heart of your darling dove. Following them religiously (and sensibly!) may make your woman see you in a different light… the light of love, adoration, and romantic companionship. That is the secret of the act of wooing a woman. It may take some time, but you shouldn’t lose hope. After all, if Rome wasn’t built in a day, how can it be any different for romance?

What are the Advantages of Being Single

It’s indeed wonderful to be in a relationship but there are times when we will be alone. Of course, being single can be a blessing as well as a curse. The reason for people being sad and lonely is that they usually see only the cons and not the pros. A single life need not necessarily doom one to despair and loneliness. Rather, it is important to appreciate the many advantages, some of which include cheaper living, job growth opportunities, etc. What are the advantages of being single? Some of them are discussed below.

Freedom

Freedom is no doubt the most important merit of being single. Freedom allows more spontaneity in life: you can go anywhere or decide on anything without being answerable to anyone. Being single allows you to be master of your own life and self, rather than compelling yourself to be what you are not. Men don’t have to worry about missing the Champions League football finals to watch the movie of the week, for the sake of their partner or family and vice versa for women. For men, being single at some stage helps them to become skilled in different household chores like cooking and cleaning.

Control Over Finances

This may be the bitter truth. Relationship besides time, requires money, and a lot of it. When single, you are in full control of your expenses. You save a lot of money instead of spending it on overpriced movie tickets or costly dinners. Also no worries about Valentine’s Day or Christmas gifts, birthday presents, or 1 month or 10 week anniversaries. Men can pamper themselves by buying a Sony Playstation 3 without getting an earful later. Women, on the other hand, can pamper themselves with a piece of jewelry or buy a new dress.

Control Over Time

We live in a busy world where people often complain that they don’t have time, although they have planned a month’s holiday beforehand with their partners. When you are single, you have time for yourself. You can give time to your hobbies, friends, family, adventures, sports, etc. This time can be utilized for personal enrichment, like working on enhancement of your career.

Decreased Stress

Stress is the major cause of all kinds of health problems. When single, you do not face the amount of stress that you would have in a negative relationship. If a marriage relationship goes sour, there is lot of stress involved in getting out of the relationship. Singles are free to choose the kind of relationship they want to be in.

Some Other Advantages
You don’t have to tolerate annoying habits of your partners like snoring, etc.
You get to know who you really are when you are single. It can give you a better awareness about yourself.
You can have a great night life. Many cities provide exhilarating nightlife to attract singles.
You can avail job growth opportunities.
You have more time to spend with friends, more time to study and more time to flirt.
You are in complete control of your TV remote.
With so many advantages, there is no reason why anyone who is single should feel sad or lonesome. We should just look at the positive side of things. The next time you find yourself alone, don’t panic, instead CHEER UP. Nothing is lost if you don’t have a boyfriend or a girlfriend. In fact there is everything to gain!

How to Handle the Pain Love Brings You

In the early stages of a relationship, it is difficult to imagine that the one for whom you have such strong feelings could ever hurt you. It is also hard to imagine that you could ever cause the one you love pain, especially when everything is so new. The beginning is always sweet and nice, but sooner or later, something less than perfect happens and one of you gets hurt.

Have you ever heard the phrase, “you always hurt the one you love?” It’s so true, isn’t it? You may not mean to, but at some point, you may do something, or not do something, that your significant other is hurt by. The opposite is also true. As a matter of fact, relationships sometimes end because of this. However, they don’t always have to.

What to Do If your Loved One Hurts You

If you are in a healthy relationship, then the hurt was unintentional. It is important to realize that your loved one didn’t plan to cause you pain, so try to see the situation from their perspective. You should try to calm your emotions down and then talk to them about what they were thinking, why they did what they did, or said what they said. Be willing to see things from their perspective. Once you hear them out, they will be more willing to hear what you have to say. Explain how you perceived what they said or did, and why you were hurt by it.

You might not be able to communicate this right away, so you should wait until an appropriate time when you are not clouded with emotion. This is easier said than done, but you should give it a try. Waiting can help you avoid saying things that you don’t mean because you are hurt and angry. Get it off your chest by talking it out or writing a brief note or an email. Don’t just hold a grudge, because it will only hurt you more.

What to Do When Your Loved One Feels Hurt

The most important thing that you can do is listen. Showing that you care about your partner’s feelings is essential to help them heal quickly. You might not understand why they are hurt initially, because you didn’t mean to hurt them. Make an effort to see it from their perspective, and try to help them understand your intentions better. Communicate to them that you do care about their feelings. Apologize if you did something wrong. Make a sincere effort to acknowledge that you could have done things differently, and express plans to avoid that kind of thing in the future. Make it clear that you didn’t mean to hurt them, and that you want to avoid doing it again.

What Not To Do

If you feel hurt, don’t:
Yell
Try to get revenge or make them pay
Hold a grudge
Demand an apology
Insist that you are right
If your loved one is hurt, don’t:
Disregard their feelings as silly
Say you’re sorry unless you actually mean it
Pretend to understand
Insist that you are right
Ultimately, clear and honest communicate can help heal the emotional wound. Be willing to do both, to listen and to talk. If forgiveness, care, and understanding are working parts of your relationship, there won’t be that much pain, and you will enjoy a long-lasting and healthy relationship that is true to life.

Dating Don’ts: Learning from Mistakes

We’ve all been there. We go out with someone who we think is absolutely perfect, and they’re super sexy to boot! Then we do or say something that makes us want to crawl under a rock and slowly rot in our regrets. We call these “dating don’ts”, and they’re the things we do that can destroy any potential relationship.

If you haven’t yet experienced this, you’re in luck! Here we’ll identify the worst of the worst, so you’ll know exactly what to avoid next time you’re out on a date. Learning from the mistakes of others is the same reason we study history in school – so that we don’t repeat the mistakes made by those who came before us. Read on and don’t let someone else’s mistake ruin your chances again!

Let’s start with one of the worst offenses…

Do NOT have sex on the first date!

If you honestly are looking for more than a one-night stand, having sex on the first date is the best way to kill any glimmer of hope, you might have had, that your single life was officially over. Why, might you ask? “If someone wants to have sex on the first date, they must really be into me”, you might be thinking. Unfortunately, by putting out on the first date, you give a man nothing to work for. He’s no longer got that ultimate goal (i.e. sex) in mind, and therefore probably doesn’t see why continuing to see you is going to lead to anything. By waiting to have sex, you give them a reason to keep seeing you, and hopefully they’ll see that there’s more to you, than your hot exterior.

Do NOT talk about your ex!

It might be hard, especially if you’re fresh out of a serious relationship. But you have to avoid involving your ex in your conversations at any cost, it is the most prudent of actions on any first date. By talking about your ex, you are revealing to your date that you’re obviously not over them. Show both your date and yourself you’re totally over your ex!

Do NOT pretend you’re someone else

What do I mean? Be yourself. If you lie, you’ll get caught in it eventually. Lies are a horrible way to start off any relationship so keep true to yourself. Be open and honest, but not too honest, either. Keep them guessing and wanting to know more. If you tell everything right off the bat, there’s no longer that sexy sense of mystery.

Do NOT dress too scantily

Showing a little cleavage is acceptable, but dressing like an exotic dancer will most likely scare off any respectable man. Sure, you might think that the sexier you are, the more likely you are to hook him, but most men will honestly tell you that slutty dress doesn’t make for a hot date. It makes for a slutty date. Keep yourself appropriately covered!

Though I’m sure there are thousands of other dating don’ts out there, these are the big ones. Avoid these and you’ll find yourself cruising on to date two! At least, I would certainly hope so! If you do mess up and fall victim to a dating don’t, do not despair! It happens to the best of us. Pick yourself up and keep on trying. Just try not to repeat the same mistake again!

Separated Beds Does Not Mean Seperated People

More and more couples are changing the design of the marriage bed. As a matter of fact, the marriage bed has turned into two separate ones. Married people sleeping on separate beds isn’t a completely foreign concept, but there is certainly a stigma regarding the idea. The common reasons for bedtime separation (sex, children, old age) still exist, but this is not a tell-tale sign of relationship problems.

Most people would think that a married couple who sleep on separate beds, must be facing some problems in the marriage. When you enter a serious relationship, sleeping in the same bed is a new and special thing. After a while of being married, living together, and sleeping in the same bed, things start to change.

Think about it. If you are newly married and one day you spouse says, “Hunny, I want my own bedroom.” Wouldn’t you have questions? That might be alright after 30 years of stealing covers from each other, but just doesn’t seem right after six months.

People of old age often can’t get the rest they need, with their partner. Snoring, tossing and turning, and getting out of bed in the middle of the night, can really disturb a light sleeper. When the kids are grown up and have moved out, there is suddenly new space to get some rest, peace and quietness. It doesn’t imply that they aren’t in love any more.

These days, couples are splitting up at nighttime, much sooner in the marriage. The first reason that most people automatically think of is sex problems. One partner may be in the mood a little too often. For some people, sleeping is very important, and for others, sex is more important. If that issue doesn’t get resolved, separate beds end up being a solution.

In the popular view, if it’s not sex, it’s the child. After the baby is born, many couples separate at night so the father can get some sleep. The mother has to get up, breast feed and change the baby. Having a difficult child, especially around the age of two, can also deter a couple from sharing the bed. A poorly behaved child, can discourage parents from touching one another for the fear of producing another one. Birth control aside, a screaming brat can totally kill the mood.

The most modern reason is a strong and independent one. These days, married individuals have lesser dependence on each other. Many a time, it just becomes a personal preference to sleep alone. A marriage with a dual income allows for personalized bedrooms, and some people just like it that way. It allows each person to continue being themselves, and enjoy their room and their sleep in their own way, without interfering with their partner’s preferences.

Some people argue that happily married people can share everything. The fact of the matter is that some people just get along better, if they can go their own separate ways, once in a while. Don’t get me wrong, but seriously it would be good if some things aren’t shared. Don’t agree with me? Well…you don’t share underwear…right!

Happy couples spend plenty of quality time together. Love making and cuddling still take place, even though they might sleep separately. It can be a fun and exciting refresher to the marriage. Quiet, personal reflection time, or just some moments alone can help one appreciate their spouse more.

Giving the relationship an opportunity to start fresh in the morning can be a good thing. Playing the dating game can be romantic. It can be a reminder of the early dates when you ‘visit’ each other’s rooms, or ‘meet’ each other in the living room. Missing each other a little bit, can become an added benefit.

I think it’s possible to enjoy a healthy and happy marriage without sleeping in the same room. After all, we all have to sleep at some point. It’s much more important to enjoy time with your partner when you are both awake, don’t you think?

Scroll down below and take the bedtime poll.